Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Wednesday

It's Wednesday night.  About six years ago I'd be spending this (and every other night) with my husband, watching TV or sitting out on the deck or patio, just talking about the events of our day.  I'd know he would go off to work at the bank the next morning, call me at my office at Lexmark a few times during the day. Maybe we'd meet for lunch.  And then later I'd see him walk through the door not long after I did.  We'd then spend our Saturday and Sunday together.  Enjoying our town or maybe taking a spontaneous weekend trip somewhere fun.

On this Wednesday night, I'm here in another town, alone, while our girls sleep.  I'm not sure when Mike will be home.  He works all sorts of crazy hours.  Never the same.  He pretends to have a "schedule," but it's so fluid and changing that I'm not sure it's the right word for it.  I haven't heard from him since he left today, but I'm assuming he's flying right now because that's the last I was told.

The doorbell rang a few minutes ago (around 9 p.m.).  A loud knock followed.  Of course I got nervous because I'm paranoid and would normally not answer the door if I'm home alone.  Junah was barking and I was afraid my girls would wake up.  I waited for the person to give up and leave.  Instead I heard loud knocking again and an attempt to turn the knob.  That made me think it was Mike for a second, he must have lost his key... then I heard a faint, "ma'am?" I went completely numb then because I remembered that Mike was scheduled for a night flight and why were these people so persistent?!  The thought of two uniformed Marines standing outside my door to deliver the worst of bad news is almost paralyzing.  Again, paranoia here.  Ends up it was some guy looking for our neighbor who recently moved away.

I'm sitting back down on the couch now.  My heart is still racing.  I'm always fearful that something is going to happen to Mike in those Harriers, but that's not what this is. The truth tonight is that I'm extra anxious and nervous because we just found out a couple days ago that Mike is deploying in ONE week, and I haven't really let it sink in until now.  He'll be gone for seven months, flying off a ship in the Mediterranean.  There will be next to no phone calls, mostly emails.  No Skype either unless they're in port. Seven months. That is daunting and very scary to me... that he'll be at war and we'll be at home without him.  That he'll miss the girls and that they'll cry for him.  That I'll cry for him.

I'll be blogging throughout his deployment, but this is why I had to make the blog private. That's why, if you're reading this, I've sent you an invitation to keep up with us if you'd like. Please pray for our family as Mike literally sails way beyond the sand and begins a challenging chapter of our lives.  Pray for all those who serve and for their families.  You may not know of all the small, everyday sacrifices these individuals make to protect our freedom.  Even when they're not deployed, they don't come home every night. Plans have to change constantly. They don't often get to meet their husband or wife for lunch. A spontaneous vacation is usually not a possibility. They miss their kids' birthdays. Holidays. They miss their babies' births and milestones. 

Lord, be with Mike and all those who serve!  Protect them and bring them home safely.  Quickly.  Please watch over the families of those who are serving overseas and at home. And I pray for peace for the families of fallen and missing military men and women.

We'll be enjoying Daddy Time whenever possible for the next week.  After that we'll watch him fly off while we wave our hands and American flags in support of our Marine.  Then I'll be back to post some pictures and give you plenty of updates on his progress and ours as the weeks and months go by.

14 comments:

sara said...

This made me cry. I'll pray for safety for mike and strength for you and the girls. Let's skype next week.

Sarah K said...

I cannot imagine how hard this is for you, Casey. I will be praying for all of you...

Cindy Pope said...

Oh sweet Casey! My heart is aching reading this! But...my prayers are even stronger. Prayers first and foremost for Mike's safe, speedy return! Prayers for your strength to endure...everything. And prayers for those precious angels little hearts and minds while their daddy is away. Thank you for the invite to keep up with your blog while Mike is away. Know that we're here if there's possibly anything we could do for you. We know that Mike has a hedge of protection around him and that God is the wind beneath his wings! Prayers and thanks and love go out to all of the Wallace's and all of our men and women and their families...always!

Sarah said...

Great post, Casey. (AFTER I grabbed a Kleenex...oy!) That made me cry, especially since we are only beginning the work-ups and I know what is to come. Or do I?? Call me any time and enjoy this last week together. I can't believe it is actually time to say that. We will be praying for all of you and we love you! Hang in there...

Chad and Sommer Tucker said...

Ive sat here a long time staring at this comment page with tears in my eyes not knowing what to say. I know there is nothing I can say or do to make you feel better. I could keep bringing your Bloomin' Onions and dessert but we both would just end up fat;)Back in Quantico I never imagined in million years it would hurt this bad. I want you to know that I will be there for you whenever you need me...day or night. I pray that we can destract each other and the kids enough to minimize the pain and speed up the days. But most of all, I pray for Mike's safety. We love you guys.

Lindsey said...

Oh Casey. I, too, am crying. Thank you for putting in to words exactly what it's like. We'll be thinking of you and the girls, and Mike, of course...
Love you!!!

Brandi said...

Hang in there Casey! We'll be praying for you, and for Mike.

jody said...

Casey, I have always thought you are an amazingly supportive and loving military wife. I know this deployment will not change that but it doesn't make it it easy. It sucks really. There will be difficult days no doubt. Something that helped Mike feel really connected with Noah when he was deployed was sending him almost weekly DVD's. I would record daily routine things...him playing, going to bed, eating lunch. The day to day life daddy misses when he is gone. And while Mike missed being able to hold him and kiss him goodnight, he felt like he was still able to watch him grow.

Your family will be in our thoughts and prayers. I am sure you will handle this with the amazing grace you have always shown,

Jody Trent and family

Missy Bryant said...

Casey, my heart breaks for you and the girls, but know for sure that I will keep Mike and all of you in my thoughts and prayers. Thanks for including me in the invite to your blog. Missy

Julane said...

Casey - I don't know what to say. I promise to pray for you. Bryan just got finished on four weeks away for residency and it was horrible. However, I had phone calls and he even came home on weekends. So, I cannot even imagine what your next 7 months will be like but I had a small glimpse with him gone and must admit I said several times to people that I shouldn't complain because military spouses do this all the time under much worse conditions. Please know if you want a road trip to get away you are more than welcome here anytime. Please call me whenever you need someone. Enjoy this last week and you, Mike and the girls will be in my prayers!

Carrie Taylor Bickham said...

Thinking of all of you and keeping you in my prayers.

mfhelm said...

Wow. I knew this was coming but my heart sank reading your blog. You all are and always will be in my thoughts and prayers. We must plan some visits. Hope to see you and the girls soon.

debicarnes said...

Casey, you know that I am praying each and everyday for Mike, you and my granddaughters. I love you all more than words can ever say. Just know that God is with each of you and is in control, he will get you through this. I look forward to seeing you soon. Love, Mom

Cristy, Nick and Caden said...

I can 't even begin to imagine your pain and the strength you must have for those precious girls. I do believe that prayer has much power in our lives, so that is one thing I do daily for our soldiers and there families. I know personnally the sacrifices our men and women make as they serve this country. I am proud of them all and also proud to know Mike and what he is doing we can never say thanks enough, but also thank you for your sacrifice in supporting him. Many, many prayers for all of you.